Friday, October 3, 2008

This is my Journal

This is my journal. This is my reflections, my heart, my desires, wants, ups, downs and twists and turns. It is not edited, it is not a book, it is not for a particular person (although Kevin often says I capture his heart as well…) it is mine and with God’s amazing love, strength and provision I am able to allow you to read a few pages of it.

This is my voice right now for I am weak. Weak from grief, from healing, from walking the journey, from losing two children, from the mountain climbed, and the storm we have weathered, and the reality of the path God has asked us to walk. My voice is weak; I can’t scream or yell and sometimes even talk.

This is my journal. It is a gift from the Lord, a picture of His amazing and sufficient grace. This is the raw and bare moments of a broken heart and weakened soul. This is the good, the bad, and everything in between. It is a picture in time, a puzzle piece, a gift of watching someone stumble and fall and come out on the other side standing strong with hands lifted high.

This is a journal, about a girl’s struggles, about a husbands wants, about a wanted child, and a baby that is missed. It is about doubt, faith, praise and questions. It is about fear, happiness, blessings and the unknown. It is about what will come and what it is. It is about our love for one another and the love we share for Christ. This is my journal, allowing you a moment in time to read a few words, to get a glimpse and to know some of my moments.

This is my Journal; this is God’s voice, his words, his child, his journey.

1 comment:

Journeygirl (not the band!) said...

Beth, I am deeply sorry for your losses but I am thankful my little blog helped in some small way. From one girl to another who has endured more than one loss, it is a hard, hard thing. Put your faith in God and trust he will see you through it. You and your husband have my thoughts and prayers.