Friday, January 18, 2008

Where have the months gone?

I remember eating a Popsicle and sitting on a box of my belongings and looking at my empty house filled with cardboard boxes and a big moving truck outside. I was sweaty and hot from packing up and making sure that everything had found its way into one of the many boxes and nothing was left behind, besides the stray sock behind the dryer that I decided we did not need. It was a sad day seeing our house empty and it was even sadder pulling out of the driveway for the last time. As we drove down Glade park drive I thought about all the memories we had made in a short 12 months. It does not take long for people to find their way into my home, memory and heart.

I can't believe I left Colorado in the heat of summer, with school letting out and Mexico missions trip on the way and seeing Amazing race finished up. I can't believe that I watched the mountains of North Carolina change into the most vibrant colors, watched the leaves fall and then raking them up until I felt as though every leaf in North Carolina had found its way into my yard. Now as I look out my window I can see far beyond what use to be blocked by numerous beautiful leaves and can see my breath as I enter out for my daily walk with my dogs. As I see the snow fall I can't help but wonder to myself where did the months and time go?

If I look back to the person who was sitting on the boxes eating a Popsicle and now look at the person who is sitting at her computer writing this, I am once again amazed at the changes God has done within my soul. I am deeper in love with him, astounded by his grace and overwhelmed by his love for me. I am overtaken by the amount of change I am experiencing with each changing season in my own life. I am being reminded through the changing of seasons in life how I always want to be changing in my walk with the Lord. Everyday is a new day, everyday I want to experience something new about my creator. I don't ever want to be in the same place stagnate in my life not experiencing all that God truly is, but I also realize that change comes with a cost. Just like the green leaves on a tree, their change in color their vibrant look, their amazing beauty comes at a cost of death, they must die in order to see the true beauty that lies within. Am I willing to die to everything I am in order to see the true change that only the Lord can bring? The answer, yes. I don't want to be chained to death, but to see the beauty that dieing to oneself really brings....New life, new heartbeat, new beauty!