I am so ready to write again. I still find it so interesting that through the grief of losing Daniel all I could really do is be silent. I still find myself heavy with grief that takes my breath away- I just miss him. I am still praying that God would release words to write Daniels story. When I think about writing it my heart pounds and my mind races, to me this means the time is not right. I know God will open that door to my heart with words that will only be from Him...I don't want to move a moment to quickly.
So I need to just catch up on the ends and outs of life...
I have 3 glorious weeks and 4 days until baby Karsten enters this world. Am I ready? Physically...YES!!! Emotionally....hmmm, he can stay in there as long as he likes! I am excited to meet this little man, and I will miss his movements and dancing. I will miss the pregnant belly, but I think my boys (especially Jaden) will be thankful they can crawl up in mommy's lap a little better :). Overall this pregnancy has been nothing but a blessing with very few hiccups. I am forever grateful and thankful every time I enter the ob- the place that was filled with pain and frustration that is now filled with joy and excitement. I am not sure why God has blessed me so and all I can do is thank Him over and over again.
I am really enjoying the Christmas season this year. Something about little kids that just makes it magical. We are not focusing on Santa at all with the boys, we figure we will see where they personally go with it, but we are not making a big deal about him. We are however trying hard to really teach them the celebration of Jesus birthday. We proudly hung Jesus birthday banner in Jaden's room and we love to pull out their nativity scene and play with it. We sing happy birthday and give baby Jesus lots of Kisses. We are also doing an Advent Calendar with them this year...I love starting these traditions that I pray impact their lives forever.
We decided to celebrate Ty's birthday a little early, this Saturday. I knew I would not be able to do much right after Karsten is born and this way he gets a celebration. So this Saturday we are having just a few people over to help us throw a very small but very special 2nd birthday for Ty! This is better suited for Ty anyway- he is not much for big crowds or lots of people...although he is doing so much better in this area! Ty is really starting to talk more too, it also warms my heart to see him follow his brother around and he absolutely loves to do anything that Jaden is doing!
Jaden is talking up a storm and communicating in ways that amaze us. There are so many times we look at each other and say "did you teach him that?" to which we both reply "nope." Ahh, thanks Nick Jr. for teaching my child right now. Yup, Nick Jr. is a staple in my home, especially when we are all sick and it is painful for me to move. I keep reminding myself that these months and days are just a season, it will not be like this forever... Anyway, my favorite phrases right now that Jaden says are "Momma I Loooooove you!" and "Momma, look at that..." or "Momma where is T-rex? Oh right there..." And yes it is a clear as that, yet in his very cute little voice!
To say I am beyond blessed really does not describe how I truly feel. I am excited to write more hopefully. God has laid a few new things to really share about, but again when the time is right. For now I must go check on two quiet little boys, which means they are into something!!