Wednesday, March 17, 2010

In Awe of What God Can DO...

I am in awe of God can do….We have been having one of those years…when I think God could not bless us anymore then He already has He shows up once again and I am left awe-struck…

I have not written this and I should have months ago, but my time is so different these days. I belong to the most amazing church and I don’t say that lightly, in fact if you know me well you know that I really don’t like churches especially big ones… Ever since high school I have been involved with youth. It was my calling and I loved it, I loved working for and with the youth! For close to ten years I worked on a staff of a church…and I started to see how corrupt churches could really be, I began to see how churches were run like a business. Now not all my experiences were bad, but I will say that the end of the day I was sick of churches and sick of working on a staff, I was what we call in the Christian community “burnt out...”

When Kevin and I got married we churched hop for the first 4 years, now of course we were moving every year and that did not make it easy to find a church home, but every time we would go to a church I would walk away with the same sick feeling that we would never find a home and that all churches were run the same…. Until we moved to NC and God led us to Breakthrough. Now I will not put Breakthrough on a pedestal and call it perfect because we are all human and sinful, but I will say that Breakthrough Church is the first church I truly feel at home in. Both Kevin and I have changed, grown and been challenged under the leadership of this church.

Even my darkest days, when it seemed I hated people, (I never hated people I just did not like people who made stupid comments about loss and infertility…and all the IF sisters say “AMEN”…) Breakthrough stood by me, sometimes silent, sometimes loud….but never the less they prayed us through to the other side and when I finally surfaced out of my “blank” hole (Read blog…), they welcomed me with open arms and excitement!

The Pastors of the church are our pastors but I am also honored to call them our friends. The first time we ever met with them I left with tears in my eyes as Pastor Michelle had also dealt with infertility for close to six years. She understood the pain and knew my aching heart. They tried for 3 years had a beautiful son and continued to try…he is now six! We became close during the losses I experienced…even when I tried to push Michelle away when she was speaking truth into my life and I was not ready or wanting to hear…, they stood by us and prayed a miracle into our lives. So when we got to share we were adopting they put their own wants and desires aside to celebrate our miracle (still brings tears to my eyes…).

I will never forget driving to Michelle’s house to tell her not only was I adopting but I was pregnant. Here they were on a waiting list for adoption for almost a year and we were not even pursuing it and we get chosen to adopt a baby, and now I am telling her that I am also pregnant, when they have been trying for six years…my heart was breaking because I knew it would cause pain in hers… But once again she put aside her wants, her desires and celebrated with me on that night…

Kevin and I prayed for their Miracle, and I prayed hard wanting it so badly for them. When I was out in Colorado to pick up Jaden I got a phone call that they would be adopting form an amazing young women who asked if they would raise her baby. ..I remember feeling so overwhelmed and excited for them, and I continued to pray… "Lord give them a double blessing…”

Sure enough one Saturday night (six days before Ty was born) we went to dinner with them, I knew in my heart they had news to share with us and sure enough they did…they were PREGNANT! Their babies would be 4 months apart…is this a coincidence?? Not if you believe in a God who can perform miracles….I do ….

Yesterday their sweet little girl was born, and in a matter of months they will welcome their baby boy! I am in awe of what God can do…

I had to experience the death of my son Judah to experience the life of my son Jaden….I am in awe of what God can do…

I became pregnant against all odds and ovulate on the side without a fallopian tube…I am in awe of what God can do…

Yesterday we got approved for a grant that will pay the cost of Jaden’s Helmet…I am in awe of what God can do…

Tomorrow my brother in law will graduate from officers training…I am in awe of what God can do…

Today I sit here with TWO sleeping babies in MY home…I am in awe of what God can do…


I stand back in awe, I serve God not because of what He does for me but because of WHO He is, the fact that He chooses to bless us makes it that more amazing.

9 comments:

Mandy said...

Standing in awe with you. What an awesome story!

The Wrights said...

praise the lord!! we serve a faithful god! rejoicing with you in the great blessing to add to the list;)

Andrea said...

Beth,

I too, am in AWE of what God can do!

God blessed you with 2 beautiful children and a wonderful, compassionate, selfless friend in Michelle.

I continue to find such HOPE and comfort in your words...your story.

Much Love and thank you for all the prayers...I feel them.

Hugs,
Andrea
xoxo

Libby said...

Girl....you are such an inspiration!! I love you more than I can even explain. Our God is amazing...lately I stand back in awe of everything He is doing in the people of Breakthrough. In my house, in my heart, in my friends lives, and in the growth of our church family.
Our God is an AWESOME God!!!!

Deni said...

I too, continue to stand in awe of all that He can do! I love hearing that your heart was in youth ministry, as that's what I do right now, and have been wanting to do for a couple of years now! What a blessing, and this opportunity for work wouldn't have happened had we not moved, again, in AWE!!

This story is moving, amazing, and inspiring! Thank you for sharing!

Bernardeena said...

What an inspiring story, God always sees the bigger plan and it is great when he brings people into our lives who we really bond with on so many levels.

Beth said...

Thank you friends for your sweet comments and support...it means more to me then you will ever know...I stand with many of you as you wait for your miracle believing it is just beyond the crest of the hills!

Beth

Stacey said...

Truly amazing! God is so good. He's good in the bad times and the good times. It's awesome when we can just sit back and see how He has been at work unfolding His perfect plan!

Love you and your sweet little family of miracles!

Becky said...

I meant to comment on this sooner. I was wondering if that was where the story was going as I was reading, but was still amazed when I got there and saw it was. I too am in awe of what God has done (in your life and in your friend Michelle's). Truly amazing. I continue to be encouraged by you and what God has done in blessing you with your two miracles.